Short Dialogs

What do you call this, tea or coffee?” demanded the angry customer. “It tastes more like castor oil.”

If it tastes like castor oil,” said the waiter, “I can guarantee it’s coffee, because our tea tastes like dishwater.”

 

Can you tell me how fast light travels?” asks the teacher a student.

“I don’t know how fast, but I know it gets here too early in the morning,” answers the student.

 

“Dad!”

“ Well, what is it?”

“It says there, ‘A man is known by the company he keeps.’ Is that so, Dad?”

“Yes.”

“Well Dad, if a good man keeps company with a bad man, is the good man bad because he keeps company with the bad man, or is the bad man good because he keeps company with the good man?”

 

A penny was all she dropped into the beggar’s hand.

“Now my poor man,” she said, “tell me how you lost all of your money.”

“Well, I was like you, ma’am,” he said. “I was always giving away large sums to the needy.”

 

“Grandpa, why don’t you get a hearing aid?”

“I don’t need it, Son. I hear more now than I can understand.”

 

 

“Sir,” said the customer as he took the bottle of milk and held it up to the light, “have you noticed there’s never any cream on this milk?”

“It is because the company always fills the bottles so full that there’s no room for cream on top,” replied the milkman.

 

 

“Wasn’t I a fool when I married you?” said the husband.

“You bet, but fools always have luck,” answered the wife.

 

One little boy asks the second little boy in the hospital: “Are you medical or surgical?”

“I don’t know,” replied the second boy. “What does that mean - medical or surgical?”

The first boy answered,Were you sick when you came, or did they make you sick after you got here?”

 

After the performance: “Did that new play have a happy ending?”

“Sure, everybody was glad it was over.”

 

“Judge, I don’t know what to do.”

“Why, how’s that?”

“Well, I swore to tell the truth, but every time I try, some lawyer objects.”

 

An employer, interviewing an applicant, remarked, “you ask high wages for a man with no experience.”

“Well,” the prospect replied, “it’s so much harder work when you don’t know anything about it.”

 

     

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